Teaching Children to Stand Up for God Without Putting Others Down

Daddy, why did the coach call Johnny stupid?

Mommy, why is that lady cursing at the cashier?

Dad, why are those two men kissing?

Mom, what did that lady mean when she said she hates Muslims?

Cue parental groaning.

Children are naturally curious. At times, this means they will ask sincere but potentially awkward questions about the actions of others.

While children have always been exposed to social and cultural practices, the modern world accelerates this exposure through social media, YouTube and a seemingly endless supply of memes and reels.

What are parents to do? How do parents teach the truth about right and wrong with clarity, at an age-appropriate level, while also preparing children to live, work, function and thrive in a society often at odds with truth?

The state of civilization

Parents face many scenarios that are challenging to explain to a child. This should not surprise us. The Bible tells us we can expect civilization to become increasingly corrupt:

“But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!” (2 Timothy 3:1-5).

People will embrace lifestyles and choices that produce conflict and decay. Morality will often flee the public square. Civilization is not so civil after all.

The cultural and moral failings of families, communities and nations bring natural consequences. See the article “The Writing Is on the Wall Today” in this issue for more information.

A parent’s job—protect and prepare

This society can have a direct impact on children. Children must learn to navigate and survive in these conditions.

Parents may feel a knee-jerk reaction to protect their children by trying to shield them from awareness of evil.

Teach children the truth, teach them how to live it without demeaning others, and then lovingly encourage their active connection with God through His Bible. Parents must wisely and properly protect their children. This requires active and engaged parenting. The online world is an area of particular concern. There are useful tools available to help. Forbes recently offered a review of apps parents can use to manage their children’s screen time and keep them safe online.

However, a parent’s role is not limited to protecting their children from danger. Parents must also prepare their children to navigate and succeed in a world that is immersed in sinful behavior and deceived by Satan (Revelation 12:9).

There is a need to guide children. God determined that parents should fill this responsibility.

“And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7).

This is a lofty challenge. God asks parents to prepare their children to faithfully mature and thrive even in a corrupt society.

Getting started

Parents’ efforts to teach their children begin with their personal example. God reminds parents to “love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength” (verse 5, emphasis added).

Parents should diligently seek guidance and direction from the Bible. The “Christian Conversion” section on Life, Hope & Truth provides several constructive articles on how to apply the Bible’s instructions to daily living.

In addition to setting a righteous example, parents should proactively teach the truth of the Bible. Solomon wrote, “My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother” (Proverbs 1:8).

Parents have a responsibility to teach. Proverbs 1-3 highlights this clear expectation.

Teaching the Bible

Teaching the Word of God is vital for preparing children to correctly discern truth and error. Where do parents start?

Here are some key elements for parents to emphasize:

1. Teach awe and respect for God.

Parents should introduce children to the greatness of God. Make clear to them the loving, holy character of God.

David noted: “One generation shall praise Your works to another, and shall declare Your mighty acts . . . They shall utter the memory of Your great goodness, and shall sing of Your righteousness” (Psalm 145:4-7).

This includes appreciation of the inspired Word of God and its practical relevance (2 Timothy 3:16-17).

2. Teach virtue and morals as defined by Scripture.

Parents should share Jesus’ summary of the law of God: love God and love your neighbor (Matthew 22:36-40).

The Bible teaches that love is bound up in the commandments of God. John wrote, “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments” (1 John 5:3). This means avoiding lying and stealing and hating others, which is likened to murder (1 John 3:15). It includes upholding the biblical standard of sex only within marriage between a man and a woman as God ordained. (For further study, see God’s 10 Commandments: Still Relevant Today.)

Parents should convey morals that are shaped by the commandments of God. This includes a determination to live by “every word that proceeds from the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4).

3. Teach children to love mercy.

Mercy is an incredible gift that enables a positive relationship with God and serves as a root for kind, warm, healthy interpersonal relationships.

Jesus encouraged, “Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful” (Luke 6:36). Parents should make this personal in the lives of their children.

Explain the significance and power of mercy by highlighting God’s mercy toward us. Set them an example of mercy. Teach them to build a practice of mercy toward siblings, friends and schoolmates.

4. Teach right judgment without condemnation.

Children must learn to discern between right and wrong, truth and error, and what is moral and immoral. There are clear standards in the Bible that define these categories.

However, parents should ensure that discernment and right judgment do not morph into arrogance and condemnation.

Jesus’ own example is compelling. “When He saw the multitudes, He was moved with compassion for them, because they were weary and scattered, like sheep having no shepherd” (Matthew 9:36; see also Luke 23:34).

Parents should demonstrate judgment regarding behavior and choices without self-righteously condemning others.

Dealing with others’ wrong choices

These elements should then be applied when teaching children to evaluate situations around them.

Humans have consistently chosen a life of sin (Romans 3:23). The choice to sin separates one from God (Isaiah 59:1-2).

The Bible warns against participating in such behavior. Paul instructs, “Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness” (Ephesians 5:11, New Living Translation). There is a clear divide between what is right and wrong. This applies to our thoughts, words and actions.

While avoiding evil, parents should instill a biblical view of other people. Children need to learn to identify and avoid sin, while still showing respect and honor to all people (1 Peter 2:17). Human beings are made in the image of God. Therefore, each person has incredible value and astonishing potential (see our booklet God’s Purpose for You).

Parents must teach children to see others through this lens. Jesus’ example of compassion when He observed failings in others can serve as a guide.

Taking action

Paul warns, “But evil men and impostors will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived” (2 Timothy 3:13). The conditions in the last days (verses 1-5) will grow exponentially worse.

How are children to thrive and succeed in this world?

The Christian duty is to endure bravely and truthfully despite the conditions around us. Paul encourages, “But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus” (verses 14-15).

There are times when children will need to stand up for truth. Parents should model how to do this without being arrogant or obnoxious.

Jesus was often quiet—neither quarrelsome nor defensive—yet He never compromised. Parents should model the “quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and reverence,” which is “good and acceptable in the sight of God our Savior” (1 Timothy 2:2-3).

Parents should reinforce our need to obey God’s law even above man’s law (Acts 5:29), while embracing mercy and compassion. As Paul reminds, “As much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12:18).

Teach children the truth, teach them how to live it without demeaning others, and then lovingly encourage their active connection with God through His Bible.

Continue in the things

The beginning of this article highlighted situations children may encounter. These present opportunities for parents to both protect and prepare their children.

Parents, embrace your responsibility. Convey biblical standards while modeling a spirit of mercy and compassion.

Encourage children to resolutely, faithfully and compassionately “continue in the things which [they] have learned” (2 Timothy 3:14).