The Disappearing Family

I was born in 1952 in a small town outside Detroit, Michigan, the youngest of three brothers. We were cared for by our mother—the homemaker, cook and caregiver to us kids. My dad was a blue-collar worker in a steel mill, a “fixer” around the house who took his sons fishing in the summer.

As was typical back then, we knew who our mother and father were. We knew that we were the Horchak family. We had an understanding of what a family was. It was a cycle of life that was familiar to many:

A man and woman grow to love and commit to each other in marriage. As they come together, they bring a small infant into the world. That baby is cared for and nurtured by the parents. The child grows up, seeing the role of his or her mother and father. In time, this child becomes a young adult and finds a mate that he or she grows to love and marries—and the cycle continues.

Fast-forward 70 years, and the landscape has drastically changed.

Today’s family

The once common model and cycle of the human family still exists but is being dismantled.

• The traditional marriage and family—with a man committed to a woman, and both caring for their children—are disappearing.
• The deliberate termination of the life of a human fetus is practiced by millions.
• People are confused about their sexual orientation, gender and personal identity.
• And many tell us this is all normal, good and natural! Thus, marriage has evolved and is considered an out-of-date institution by many.

The entire definition of family is being changed.

With such dramatic changes to an age-old institution occurring so rapidly, it is worth asking, How did the human family begin?

The origin of family

Anthropologists tell us that the family structure evolved over millions of years from prehominid beings. However, the Bible tells a very different story. It’s a story that involves belief in a Creator.

Unfortunately, many today simply don’t believe in God. Yet believing that God created man is essential in order for us to fully understand how men and women were designed to interact and relate to each other.

As the Creator, God revealed this from the beginning.

The book of beginnings, Genesis, reveals much about the family’s origin.

We read in Genesis 1:1 that “God created the heavens and the earth.” The account continues by giving an overview of the six days of creation. God set in motion the heavens, the terrestrial hydrology and environment of the planet and then He fashioned many animals.

But then in verse 26, the narrative takes a dramatic turn.

We see in the next few verses the Godhead addressing the pinnacle of His creation—unveiling the foundation and purpose of human life!

This unique focus is confirmed in verse 26: “Then God said, ‘Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’”

God’s Word reveals an astounding truth about mankind’s beginnings, hinting at the Creator’s intent in creating humans.

Chapter 1 continues: “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth’” (verses 27-28).

In these three verses we find that God designed and put human beings on earth for a very special purpose.

“Image” and “likeness” refer to resemblance to God and to the abilities and potentials patterned after God’s.

In verse 27, we find the image and likeness of the Creator is fully expressed by two beings—male and female.

From the very beginning, as we read in Genesis, God intended our lives as human beings to be, in effect, the prototype of glorified life existing within His family. God designed mankind in His image as male and female. Science confirms that every male has an X and Y chromosome, and every female has two X chromosomes. It was God’s design.

A few years ago evolutionary anthropologist Anna Machin acknowledged the unique nature of humans, noting how males and females are genetically predisposed to different functions.

In her Aeon article “The Marvel of the Human Dad,” Dr. Machin wrote, “Fathers are so critical to the survival of our children and our species that evolution has not left their suitability for the role to chance. Like mothers, fathers have been shaped by evolution to be biologically, psychologically and behaviourally primed to parent. We can no longer say that mothering is instinctive yet fathering is learned” (January 2019).

“Irreversible reductions in testosterone and changes in oxytocin levels prepare a man to be a sensitive and responsive father, attuned to his child’s needs and primed to bond,” Dr. Machin noted. “The reward of chemical dopamine increases . . . whenever he interacts with his child.”

The article highlighted the unique survival skills, risk-taking and problem-solving skills and mental resilience that human fathers teach their children.

While many in society suggest that our male and female roles are simply cultural or media-driven stereotypes, Dr. Machin sees these differences as being driven by DNA and the result of evolution.

But the Bible teaches that men were created to father. God reveals He designed man and woman distinctly unique, and for a profoundly important purpose.

The necessity of the woman

In Genesis 2 we read that God planted a garden in Eden in which He put the man. God instructed Adam about the garden and specifically about a tree from which he was forbidden to eat—the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

Then God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him” (verse 18). This was not simply a reaction to solve Adam’s loneliness, but the Creator’s way of completing the pinnacle of His creation—human beings designed in His image!

In verses 21-23 we find God anesthetized Adam and performed divine surgery! He took bone and thus DNA from Adam and created the woman.

Verse 24 gives a directive from the Designer of human life for a man to be joined to his wife and become “one flesh” (pointing to a committed relationship in marriage). Adam and Eve were to have children and were to dress, keep and have dominion over all of God’s created order. This instruction was given to no other form of life on earth—and prefigured a larger purpose and plan!

God instructed these humans, created in His image, to live and interact with each other in a unique way that pointed to their purpose. A man and a woman were to begin yet another family by departing from their parents and becoming one flesh. It is a relationship designed with the prospect of ultimately expressing the image and likeness of the Creator God.

Marriage targeted

Not long after, we read in Genesis 3 how Satan (represented by the serpent) targeted the first family by enticing Eve to ignore the teachings of her Father (God) and eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

Both Adam and Eve rebelled against God’s commands, leading to a distorted example of the functioning of marriage and family, which was to be the physical precursor of God’s future plan for mankind.

The final words in Genesis 3 show that from that time forward, God kept man from accessing the tree of life (verse 24). Adam, Eve and their descendants were on their own. They would now determine and define their own future.

Man’s departure from God and His plan was a pattern that would be repeated throughout history. Not only have humans determined their own definition of right and wrong, but they have departed from God’s design for the foundation of society—that of the human family.

Family prefigures God’s plan

While the Creator hinted at the special nature of His creation of man from the beginning, we see later in His Word that the human family was to physically prefigure God’s ultimate destiny for man—to become a part of His glorified, spiritual family!

Thus we begin to see why family is so important. It is the one relationship designed by the Almighty that typifies God’s eternal plan.

Throughout the Bible, we find many scriptures that point to His design. In John 3:1-8, Jesus explained to Nicodemus that a person must ultimately be “born again” to be in God’s family, the Kingdom of God. The author of Hebrews states that “bringing many sons to glory” was God’s intent (Hebrews 2:10).

Romans 8 describes in detail God’s design for humanity. In verses 14-17 Paul tells how converted people call God their “Father” and are joint heirs (in the same family) with Christ, inheriting an eternal future in that spiritual family!

“For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the spirit of sonship. When we cry, ‘Abba! Father!” it is the Spirit himself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him” (Revised Standard Version).

In verse 29 Jesus Christ is referred to as the “firstborn among many brethren.” He is our Elder Brother.

In fact, a full understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ involves learning how God’s design of human marriage and family is a type of God’s plan for all of humanity. For more on this, see “The Reason You Were Born.”

The mystery of God’s plan

In Ephesians 3:9, Paul discussed what he called the “mystery” of God. He acknowledged these precious truths, made available to the Church, have been hidden from the rest of mankind.

In Ephesians 5 Paul further revealed details of the purpose for human marriage and family and how it prefigures the relationship of Christ to the Church. This touches on the deeper meaning of how marriage—the God-given roles of a husband and a wife—relates to our becoming members of the family of God.

“For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church” (Ephesians 5:30-32).

The God family

The concept of God being a family is considered sacrilegious to some. In fact, many in the Christian world embrace the doctrine of the Trinity—a teaching that has no biblical basis. This belief is contrary to what the Word of God has to say about our destiny and potential as human beings, the expectation that we will actually be born into the God family.

God has always wanted His family to grow!

From the very beginning, as we read in Genesis, God intended our lives as human beings to be, in effect, the prototype of glorified life existing within His family.

Men and women will be changed from mortal to immortal (1 Corinthians 15:50-53). What an incredible moment that will be! What a glorious purpose marriage and family prefigure.

Our modern culture has departed from God’s design in so many ways.

What our society practices today is much different from the Creator’s intent for a committed relationship of love between a man and a woman, a close bond between a husband and his wife and their children.

Yet there is hope for the human family and, more importantly, for the future of God’s spiritual family!

To understand more about God’s purpose for marriage and family, download our free booklet God’s Design for Marriage.